Journey

Wow. This time today my life was entirely different. Okay, not entirely. I exaggerate. BUT, yesterday was the last day of my perception of “normal” for the foreseeable future, and that has undeniable impact on my today.

When I was 17 years old I lived in Idaho. I wasn’t there because my family up and moved, rather I was a nanny for my extended family living there. At the time my aunt was pregnant with their eighth child, and I went to do what good I could. (Ha, that was a fun phrase to write. “What good I could.”) Anyway, I was there for about 5-6 months, and after that I came home and began college. Now that same Uncle has (tentatively diagnosed) cancer, and I am again flying to Idaho to provide whatever help is needed.

We found out yesterday, and ever since it was almost as if I could feel the gears of my life slowing, altering, and re-accelerating in a new direction. It’s unnerving and exciting, all at the same time. I fly out on Saturday. I have a long list of small necessities to complete before my departure, but just for a moment I want to pause and let my mind truly comprehend the change.

I’m ready for my next adventure.

 6279bf8cfc938c924026baabdd3587d6

98% of blogging motivation…

I alluded vaguely in my blog-ish intro that I am currently suffering from a certain loneliness. Such is indeed the case, although my loneliness is in no way the result of anything horrifically tragic or devastating. Rather, I am lonely because my most marvelous husband is painfully far from me.

My sweetheart is completing his 4th year of medical school. We’ve been married for a whopping three months, and he is now traveling (and will be for the next three months) for his schooling. This distance is proving quite difficult for me, and has resulted in much soul-searching, and quite a few empty jars of nutella.

I am in no way concerned as to my most wonderful fella’s love for me, but sometimes I just feel a bit abandoned and unconnected. But this helps.

   a05a9a2be86bccbbaf63ff6ba9d4c5aa

Hey, October

Fall is without a doubt my favorite season. I know that everybody feels that way about autumn (how could they not?), but even still, simply looking out my windows sends me into little giddy waves of excitement. Here are a few of my favorite artistic representations of autumn.

I adore the way the trees seem to reach toward the unseen sky.

I adore the way the trees seem to reach toward the unseen sky.

This image puts me in mind of Marianne Dashwood from Sense and Sensibility.

This image puts me in mind of Marianne Dashwood from Sense and Sensibility.

“And how does dear, dear Norland look?” cried Marianne.

Dear, dear Norland,” said Elinor, “probably looks much as it always does at this time of year. The woods and walks thickly covered with dead leaves.”
Oh!” cried Marianne, “with what transporting sensations have I formerly seen them fall! How have I delighted, as I walked, to see them driven in showers about me by the wind! What feelings have they, the season, the air altogether inspired! Now there is no one to regard them. They are seen only as a nuisance, swept hastily off, and driven as much as possible from the sight.”

“It is not every one,” said Elinor, “who has your passion for dead leaves.” Chapter 16

I enjoy imagining what might be waiting around the corner in this image. Most likely another brightly-decked pathway, but maybe...a tiger, or something equally exciting.

I enjoy imagining what might be waiting around the corner in this image. Most likely another brightly-decked pathway, but maybe…a tiger, or something equally exciting.

Autumn leafs over water--such a thing eludes description!

Autumn leafs over water–such a thing eludes description!

I love it when the sun is setting on an autumn sky. It is as if the sun catches the world on fire, showering the world with vibrant shades of orange, and liberal splashes of yellows and browns.

I love it when the sun is setting on an autumn sky. It is as if the sun catches the world on fire, showering the world with vibrant shades of orange, and liberal splashes of yellows and browns.

Perhaps this painting is faintly too chilly for the current temperature--but it's charming nonetheless.

Perhaps this painting is faintly too chilly for the current temperature–but it’s charming nonetheless.

In the wake of this glorious season, I’ve been compiling an ever-growing list of autumnal activities to indulge in. Here is what I’ve collected thus far:

1) Carve one pumpkin, and paint one! I’ve never painted a pumpkin before. Wish me luck!
2) Make pumpkin-y sweets! Pumpkin bread, pumpkin muffins, pumpkin waffles, pancakes, cookies and pie! Yum. I do rather adore pumpkin.
3) Bake Halloween-esque treats (Ghostly oreo truffles http://bubbleandsweet.blogspot.com.au/2012/09/army-of-ghosts-super-easy-cake-pops.html , pretzel bones http://www.pinterest.com/pin/224194887673181783/ , etc,–creepy sweets sound fun!)
4) Ding-dong-ditch people, pumpkin-style! (Buy a pumpkin trick-or-treat bucket, fill it with sweets and ding-dong-ditch somebody!)
5) Read creepy, entrancing scary stories! Dracula, Portrait of Dorian Gray, Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, etc,.
6) Watch spooky movies!

That’s all I’ve got thus far, but it is certainly enough to keep me hopping for the time being.

Tiptoeing on the Brink of Brilliance.

I find the enclosed photograph quite inspiring. I’ve felt like this feeling before, as if on the threshold of something incomprehensible and exciting.

0ad5a0e7ba9fdc2decff3baf8cca65ca

I feel that way now as I type, even though I do not claim that my writings will in any way taste of brilliance. Rather, I consider this experience brilliant because I am discovering in myself a previously untapped wealth of type-able resources, simply waiting expectantly in the tips of my fingers for my thoughts to catch wind of them and type them into coherent, tidy words.

In spite of the readiness with which my thoughts and feelings expectantly flow from fingertip to screen, I confess myself as feeling slightly intimidated. My own thoughts astound me, simply by virtue of belonging to my being and having never before been personally voiced…but what if I am simply catching up to the rest of humanity, and my world-rocking mental connections are currently common knowledge? The somewhat daunted part of my whispers that my own thoughts may well be irrelevant.

Fortunately, the more insightful part of me discards this notion as nonsense, and tells me that there is a reason that the concept of the cliche’ is alive and thriving–it’s because even if a cliche’ is present it STILL has value, because to someone it isn’t a cliche’, it is a first-time realization that connects you to the world of emotion. And so, all thwarting thoughts aside, in I dive to discover and convey my own inner life. There will also be recipes, and perhaps even photos of puppies as well.